- Common Positions You Will Jolt Awake From In Your First Year of Motherhood
- Popular Stock Photos, Adjusted for 2020
The American Bystander
- Ask Jabba, Issue #14, illustration by Marques Duggans
- “Happy Socks” Didn’t Just Spice Up My Wardrobe, Those Bright Bastards Also Tried To End Me
- An Email from My Boss The Monday After The Freaky Friday My Toddler Went To Work in my Body
- Welcome to Hell: Freshman Orientation
- What I Really Want & What I’ll Actually Get This Mother’s Day
- What Critics Are Saying About The Year 2020
- Welcome to Your Nightly Rumble in the Co-Sleeping Jungle!
- Top 10 Sex Dreams I’ve Had About Michael Bublé
Points in Case
- The Five Stages of Grief for When You’ve Found a Magical Pot of Gold, But Keeping It Means Being Relentlessly Hunted by a Wee Murderous Irishman
- Never in 145 Million Years Will I Regret Building a Family Fun Park Filled with Prehistoric Killing Machines
- Their Lack of Obedience is Disturbing: Darth Vader’s Parenting Diary
- Krampus, the Kristmas Demon, is Coming to Town!